2009

Can you believe that it is almost 2009??
I can't. This year went really fast for me. Although i"m not exactly sure why. It seems like just a month ago it was August. I think part of it might have been that this is the first year in a few years that I haven't moved. That kind of stretches the year out, packing and taping and unpacking and looking for stuff and rearranging your room and all that. Thankfully this year I stayed in the same house, in the bedroom. That was nice.

Lotta good stuff happened this year, but I won't name them all. Partly because I can't seem to remember all of them, and it wouldn't be very interesting.
I started a totally awesome story in...August i think. Good birthday and all that. Good Christmas, Good Thanksgiving, Good other-peoples-birthdays. All that fun stuff.

My brother says: "My favorite thing of 2008 is...getting a Tak game for my birthday."
My sister says: "Art Camp."

I think one of my favorite things is....having a good friend of mine stay during the summer. It's hard to pick something, though. You know?

Okay moving on.
I have no book to read currently, it's rather disappointing. I should have gone to the library this week...I doubt anyone will want to go tomorrow. Maybe I can steal one from someone else....
Although my music stock has been pretty good lately.
I don't have a lot to say, just waiting to bring in the new year mostly. Hangin' out with my people and waiting until 11:45 or so.
Going to be soon now I guess. I"m excited, this is a very good holiday. If only people made as big a deal out of New Years here as they did about the Chinese New Year. Festivals and all that jazz.


Alright I'll go now. I doubt anybody has actually read this blog anyways, but whatever.
Catch ya later.
Have a good 2009

Bored

I am very bored and I just got finished shopping and I don't want to exert a lot of brain-power right now. so I am going to do this little UrbanDictionary-thingy.

Go to urbandictionary. com and type in your answer to each question in the search box, then write the FIRST definition it gives you. (this is fun, you guys should totally try it! haha)

1. Your name? Leigh
A name for girls who are prissy but not, genuine but not really. Girls with this name often are amazing, stunning , and a are BAMFS.

3. One of your friends? Hannah
1.a girl who is hotter than the flames of hell


4. What should you be doing?
School
an inhumane experiment where the governments tries to throw as many people as possible together in the same building and fuck with them without getting sued for it


5. Favorite color?
purple
one of the key ingredients to Grape Drink,-
Sugar, Water, Purple


6. Hometown?
Fernandina Beach
Termed "The Dirty Dina" by many locals for the widespread use of drugs and alcohol, and also for the rampant, ever expanding, and interconnected sexual activities among peers and/or randoms.

7. Month of your birthday?
February
People born in February are without a doubt the Cutest, Smartest, and Funniest set of people. If you are born after the 20th, you are also a Pisces. This is the best Zodiac sign.


8. Last person you talked to?
Emory
Expensive private school in Atlanta Georgia


9. Where are you right now?
Bedroom
he room in your house where you sleep and keep your clothes. Bedrooms usually have a closet in them.

10. Your nickname?
Schmoopie
A very cute thing/person. Usually referring to kids, loved ones, or animals.

11. Your significant other?
Nonexistant
The person one becomes after being dumped or factored out of a relationship.

12. Your favorite sport?
Baseball
A game only intelligent people understand.


And that is all I've got at the moment.

Happy Christmas Eve-Eve!
Leigh

എ ചീര്ഫുല്‍ അപ്ഡേറ്റ്

So, it is officially the holiday season. I guess it was "officially" the holiday season on November 28. Or, depending on the country, December 1st or November 1st. I like to start mine at the beginning of the month. Get your tree on the 3rd, decorate the rest of the house by the 5th, start playing non-stop holiday music, begin baking. Well it is now officially the holiday season because I can now eat sugar cookies ^.^
It makes me super duper happy because that's like...The cookie. In my mind anyhow. Next week we'll probably make tons of other cookies as well. I am very excited about Christmas, it's just a happy time, even if it's not the most...luxurious year. I think luxurious fits there. I have no idea what I am getting four people though...it was very strange to buy a Christmas present on December 1st, when there still were no decorations or anything in my house. Which is why I haven't really been thinking about getting people things until this week. Wouldn't want to get it all done before Christmas Eve anyways.

My wonderful sisterly friend forced me to come up with a character so that she could draw it. It's digital art so I'm not sure if "draw" is the correct term, but it works for now. I really like this character, her name is Amina and she is awesome. She's sort of a spy/lady in waiting (Think Tamora Pierce type setting). Amina has the bone structure of an East Indian girl, and suntanned skin, and periwinkle eyes, and she is about 5'5" and is very graceful. I am having a serious problem coming up with her story, because I think I'm trying to force it too much. So what I'm going to do, is I'm going to step back and re-evaluate. I will develop Amina as a person more, and then find out where and how she grew up and come up with new people for her story and so-forth. I don't know if I'm going to do a first-person thing or go for the "I see all and know all but I mostly just know Amina" type deal. Maybe I should try and write it longhand.

So basically this was a pointless blog that just passed the time between baking cookies and eating supper.
See ya,
Leigh

(Don't know whats going on with the title but I don't care enough to change it)

Albino

I found a pink elephant:



It's actually mildly disturbing. I never liked the Disney movie Dumbo. It was so cruel: Jumbo was called Dumbo and wasn't allowed to see his mama (always made me want to cry) and the freaky clowns were mean and the magpies made fun of his ears and okay the mouse was okay, but then Dumbo got drunk (except I didn't know it at the time) and there was this creepy song with all these pink elephants and it was just weird. I really don't like that movie at all...
Aside from the fact that it reminds me of Dumbo, its kind of a cute elephant.


Albino Peacocks are cool though:



Pretty, all magic-looking and stuff.

The lion is pretty spectacular as well:



Lions are always cool though. I could write a story about white lions and peacocks and such.... Or at least come up with the idea ;] The worst part of albino-ness is the red eyes. I used to go to the fair with my family, and we'd always stop in at the animals and stuff, and there would be a lot of rabbits and chickens and whatnot. The rabbits were usually white, which was cool, with pink eyes, which was creepy. And white rats, other than the fact that they are rodents and are all lab-y, are creepy too.

I won't put any pictures of the albino squirrel or alligator, because they are menacing (and slightly disturbing),
I own no rights to any of those pics, btw, found them via google images.


Yeah, so uh....That's what I found.

Squiggled

a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, r, s, t, u, v, w, x, y, z.
Why must we insert letters into the numbers? I mean, I get that there has to be something as a placeholder for what we dont know. The variables. But why letters? Why not make a custom squiggle? Pi has it, multiplication (which used to be x, but because of variables changed) has it, devision and squared have it, etc. So why can't we make one for variables? Make a bag of like...10 or so custom variable-squiggles.
I suggest letters from the font style "symbols".(or something thereabouts.)

And you see, this is what I am doing as I avoid learning about variabled squiggles (=D)


I'd keep going, but my wind ran out.
Ta dears,
L

Tater

Happy December!
I'm actually quite excited about this up-and-coming month. Holiday stuff, getting fat(er) and fancy twinkle-lights. Sounds fun, even though I have no money..

So anyways. I love, love, love potatoes. They are like, the bomb. Mashed potato is bestest. My brother makes good ones, but they're fancy with like garlic powder or something in them. My mom's are really creamy. But my Grandma makes them best. They're never any good left-over though. So while I was pondering this unfortunate truth of leftover-mashed-potatoes I thought "Hey, why not make it a potato patty?" Kinda like crab cakes. Well, I personally think this is a wonderful, wonderful idea, but alas this did not happen. Instead, my Grandma made mention of a mashed potato casserole type thing. You mix the leftover potatoes with some sour cream and spread it in a baking dish and put butter on top and bake it. Seriously fantastical, but Potato Patty sounds nicer.

You know what else is good about potatoes? French fries. And potato soup. And baked potatoes. And boiled potatoes. And tuna-potato-stuff. And slicing them like chips and semi-frying them. And when you name your adorable, curly dog Tater.

Take care!
<3 L

Transition

So Thanksgiving has come. And it has gone. And on black friday some people were trampled in wal*mart. And someone died.

Happy Holiday's

I would write more, possibly something cheerful, but I don't feel like it.

<3

“I love you.”
Not just words, they mean something. It is sound behind the emotion. It’s like laughing; you put it into context, so to speak. Love is something so real, it can be unbearable. It’s your heart. Not your heart-the-organ, your heart-the-essence. When you love somebody for real, your true love, they are your soul mate. Your other half, your one and only. This is about your heart-which-is-actually-not-a-heart-but-actually-a-soul. It’s painful. So good it hurts? Does it always hurt or just when you know it’s hopeless? Is it longing? There really are not any good words to describe the feeling except Love. Desire is close but too grabby. Lust is purely surface satisfaction. Longing is the hopelessness of love. Adore is a casual love that comes with a kiss on the hand. Worship is too much like begging for love in return.

I’ll figure it out more once I experience it in full.


Just something I thought about,
xxxx L

Mood Swings

I used to think the weather was bipolar. Now I realize that it is also the heat and air system in my house. I tend to label people (jokingly) as being bipolar. One minute they’re up, happy, teasing. Then you look again and...sad, grumpy, down. It was so weird to me that people could go from one extreme to another (with or without a mental illness) so quickly.

I experienced it, sort of, today...this evening. I was happy today, surprising myself and others I’m sure with my bounciness. At one point I got really silly, laughing at things that, thought not horrible, were not funny. I got very excited over ice cream (yay), and over ripping my CD’s (...) to my mp3 player (cheap, not iPod). And even when I was thinking about school, even doing some, I didn’t get down about it, like I usually do. And then I came back from cheerfully reading the assigned pages of my for-school novel and set up an appointment with my teacher. Okay, not quite as great as before, but still not bad. And then I IMed my sister for whatever reason and thus proceeded a guessing game. Me getting more and more pissed off by the moment and her (unconsciously egging me on) oblivious to how I felt about it. I told her I wasn’t in the mood, she told me to keep guessing. I wracked my brain; I had no clue what it could have been. None at all. She persuaded me (like she often does) to keep guessing, even after I had said “no”. I got very mad at her and told her so. She asked why I was mad at her. I rattled off a list of stuff that was bothering me, but hadn’t really realized it until that moment. She got defensive (naturally), and I ignored her. I sent an IM to another of my best friends (thank God for them) and calmed down and decided that I didn’t hate my sister completely. It wasn’t my sister that had made me angry; she had just sort of set it in motion. I mean yeah, it was incredibly frustrating, but I tend to bottle things up and try to ignore them. Which ends up with me getting upset over not-a-big-deal things.
But, back to the point, I was very cheerful today and then, in a matter of about, oh...15 minutes I was angry and crying (unfortunately yes). Sure, there is an explanation for my unhappiness, somewhat including my sister but not completely; mostly because of some lame things that have been bothering me for quite awhile. But it was weird, the way it happened. I guess you had to be there.

Anyways, so I calmed down and figured out how to solve the stuff that’s bugging me (mostly), and am now going to wash my face and read for a long time and not think.

xoxo –
L


PS. I sincerely hope I did not offend anybody with or knowing someone with bipolar disorder.

Newly Discovored

I have observed that these types of things (blog) are more exciting when they are new. More traffic, more posts, more interesting-things-to-say. This is likely to happen to me, I am very much one for "new". But who really knows. And who knows if I will ever have something "interesting" to say.
What is Interesting? According to Miriam-Webster it is exciting curiosity or attention. That seems about right, but it really could be anything. It all depends on who is judging what to be interesting.

But on another note, the World Wide Web is so much more intertwined (no pun intended) than I had ever begun to imagine. I know multiple people on blogspot (here!), myspace (here), deviantart (here), and facebook (here), which is actually a little odd. I had no idea that facebook was as popular as it is until I was told I had to join. I did know myspace was that popular. I did not know deviantart was as cool as it is. I had no idea that blogspot was like this. Yay.

I really have nothing else to say, just figured I would enlighten you all (...) with a bit of my thoughts.


Back to it then,
L

Musings

At night when I try and fall asleep, I find it nearly impossible to turn my brain off. The on/off switch has disappeared when I turn off the light. Yet in the middle of the day, when I am talking to friends or doing math, or just sometimes thinking about a song, I will completely zone out. Neither here nor there, in that place between awake and asleep. Between conscious and subconscious. I find myself in a different area, the walls of my bedroom have disappeared and I can barely feel them containing me. I am completely free of the bounds of gravity and am practically bouncing in all directions. I find that I can lose myself like this several times a day, totally and completely oblivious to my surroundings even as I am being spoken to.

On multiple occasions I become aware that I am not with the moment, but creating my own. It is best described as the sensation of realizing that you are dreaming; like pinching myself to see if I can feel it. Sometimes this pinching works all too well and I am pulled from my fantasy time. Jerked rudely away from my musings. Sometimes I bring this upon myself, and sometimes by someone else. Going into these daydreams is easy, like slipping into water. But it is always an unpleasant experience when I exit my surreal world. No matter how smooth the transition is, it will undoubtedly be bumpy. The middle part is probably best, before I realize what I’m doing and after I have left my conscious state of mind. My mind is free to go wherever it will, I can’t control it and I don’t want to. This is probably the closest I will ever get to flying. I have a very similar experience as I lie in bed and try and fall asleep at night, only much more active.

No matter how tired I am I always find myself thinking about the oddest things, sometimes not quite as pleasant. I try and stay focused on a singular topic, but my mind runs away from me. At such times I realize that I am letting my mind take control. Almost as soon as I close my book every night, my mind begins to whir, the cogs and gears coming up with things, and I just cannot stop them spinning. For awhile listening to music helped me to concentrate on one thing. The melody, the lyrics, the rhythm of the music. But after a few months the effect started wearing off. I was thinking around the music. Music that I knew by heart didn’t help because I would sing along or ignore it, and new music that I didn’t know so well made me pay too much attention to the music; tensing up, trying to catch every word.

I don’t know what gives me such tendencies, but I wish that it would become more constructive. Ideas building on each other, working toward a similar goal, instead of just absorbing everything from around me. Picking better times to space out. Falling asleep at night.

That's all for now.